Two Chainz

It may be a tad difficult to realize...
but we are way more alike more than we are different...

Men and Women
Blacks and Whites
Jews, Gentiles (...whatever gentiles are)

We cry, we love, we die.
Its obvious too, that we are all  very afraid
Afraid that who we are is wrong,
That the hand we were dealt is missing a few good cards

There is nothing more we can do than try.
Play the best game we can,

When I talk to you,
I am talking to myself,
sub subconsciously
Partly because, in actuality I still believe I'm the only one who reads this.

Even though deep down I hope that isn't the truth.
I just wanna be better than I was yesterday.
I just want to smile.
Brighter than I did this morning.
I am constantly progressing.
Maturing and growing.
As the 20th year of my life comes to a close.
I reflect on a life well lived.
Considering...
I am thankful for all of my lessons I've learned.
All of the lies i've been told.
All of the people that have been place in my path.

These 20 years have been as long as a lifetime.
But hopefully, if it is in His will,
I will see 20 more.
Learning way more than I could ever imagine.
Clenching tight on the faith that' has brought me this far.

I believe my life is a story.
I believe this happend for a reason.

I know that one day, maybe 10, or 20 years from now,
I can recollect this very moment.
These feelings will rush beck to me like rough waves on a cloudy day.

I know
That this is what I write for.

I may not be a wordsmith.
I may not be as innovative as the next guy.
I may never be on time
I may not run as fast as I want,
or be as graceful as I would like..
but I'm trying.

I don't have anything else to do on this Earth
but try.

So the next time you catch yourself comparing your current state to his.
Belittling your skills, or knowledge...
Know this.
We are all made from His image.
 With the same nomenclature, the same blood running through our veins.

There is nothing stopping you from being whatever you desire to be.
Your life.
is yours.

Fuck the rest.


Truuuuuuuuuuuuu

My First Post.

Honestly,
I have a really hard time communicating
Especially when I write...
This intimacy that we share with my words frightens me,

Spoken words are easily consumed and forgotten
But these words...  the ones written for eyes I don't see, and faces I can't read
Makes me uneasy, at best.
I feel so venerable

Granted,
No one asked me to do this, to be here...
But I can't seem to break free from this feeling.

The best I've done to eliminate my fear of this scrutiny, is lie...
I leave out bits or chunks of truths to mold my life into this masterpiece.
To eliminate any reason for critique
It's so incomplete,
There's this void in almost everything that I write.

I have this journal,
I keep it in my nightstand, the top drawer
Right by my bed
So that its never too far away.
Even in the pages of my own personal daily records,
My words seem so foreign
I don't know why I have this great fear.
Of being open, or free...

I  don't want to be wrong.
I don't want to reviel my weaknesses, or my desire, to anyone.
Including myself...

I long so much, to be understood.
To simply be understood.
But what I fail to do is allow people in.
In relationship I'm guarded.
I assume everyone is a monster,
before I even try.
I don't try.
I'm afraid of the monsters,
Those goblins hiding in my closet, creeping under my bed.
I just want to be free.
Open
Honest.

I suppose this is where courage comes in...
And maturity.
I have to learn how to take criticism,
and be unscaved by the negativity of outsiders.
Scammers, heart thieves, and demons.

I promise to be real.
...At least on paper.
Until I muster enough courage to believe what I dream.
And to speak what I know.

Me playing small serves no purpose.
Other than to allow others to use me as a stepping stone.
I'll pull myself to the top.
Without crabbing my way to success.


Honesty
Integrity
Hard work
Family

and Love.
Nothing can be accomplished without Love.

Let them eat cake...

Of course we know that everything happens for a reason.
Is it smart for us to simply agree to disagree, or shut up and color as life stomps on our strengths and reveal our weakness...
Its hard for me to believe that there is no such existence of peace.
A freedom from fear, doubt, and grief.
Why can't we just be okay?
Why must everything be challenged?

The answer is faith.
I think the answer is faith, faith is the grace of God, God is the key to heaven... And I supposed heaven is the peace we so long to receive

Or I could be wrong,
Eh
Por favor

A little inspiration...

God bless you.
May you always dream.
Keep faith,
Never give up.
And exhale until you are empty.

Spice Girls.

A lil late night inspiration for the soul....



Look at them then...
Look at them now.
Optimism is the key to success.
Believe in yourself.
Haters have a job to tend to, allow them to continue.
Beyonce' is one of my greatest inspirations.
She has the stuff.
She just has the stuff,
I can't wait until I maximize my potential.




Destiny's Child was amazing,
The dancing...
Everything.
The concept...
Everything.
The message...
EVERYTHING!!



Ladies.
You don't need Steve Harvey to keep a man,
You just need to focus...
 on your relationship.
Cater to one other.
It's easy to let jealousy and pride take over,
don't let it.




Self- explanatory.
This is mad real.
Its fun not wearing lots of clothes sometimes...
As a woman, I appreciate the attention. 
If I must put it on display,
I'd much rather put it on a porcelain platter
as opposed to a paper plate.




This video kinda makes me stop breathing.
Not only is Mrs. Carter breath-takingly beautiful,
I can see the love in her eyes.
I tear up every time I hear this song,
She gives me so much hope.
Love...
It's out there.
Somewhere.
I'm anxious.
I'm patient.

#Based

I don’t care if you judge me.

I don’t care anymore…

Trying to please you is only going to cause my heart more pain.

I am whoever I am.

Whatever I do.

Whoever I am .

If you say I’m incompetent or selfish then that’s who I am.

I do not care.

I’m sorry to offend you.

I may be wrong.

But at least I feel good.

At least I keep moving forward.

And that I will.

I have faith that I will be a master.

I will not be a slave.

Not to you or anyone.

I break my own rules.

I pave my own path.

Fuck you.

Pay me.

Respect me.

Or don’t.

You have a choice now.

Remember that everything will change.

I will remember,

I pray to my God.

I don’t care if you believe.

I commit my own sins.

I don’t care if you agree.

I dance to my own drums.

Drifting on and off beat.

Fuck it.

I                         am              me.

And baby that’s all that I can be.

If  you could take some time and focus on you

Maybe you could understand me.

I love.

My love has wide stretched open arms

Waiting for your embrace.

Embrace my love.

Or don’t

I’ll be just fine. Alone

Unafraid to love again.

Expecting the worst

Praying for reciprocity.

Everything happens.

And then something else happens.

Then we forget.

Never forget.

Never look back.

Believe.

The impossible.

That’s the only way things change.

 Be you.

Who the fuck else are you gonna be?

It’s okay that your not perfect.

WE are not perfect.

Show me some bad.

Let’s compare notes.

 Wouldn’t I be a liar if I just showed you the good in me?

El fin.

I have a hard time concentrating some times,
My thoughts have a mind of their own...
and maaaaannn, does that get annoying.

Well, I intended on this being my last post on here... I changed my mind
I tried so hard to come up with the perfect goodbye post.
I even wrote a rough draft, on paper...
Paper I say!!

Blasphemy, I know.
But, nah... paper is pretty cool.
It can help you to remember your thoughts a whole lot faster than typing can.
Paper doesn't freeze.
You can't screen shot paper,
but you can copy it...
That's alright too, I suppose.
But thankfully these past 2 weeks at work without a computer,
have helped me to remember the perks of having paper around.
So, shouts out to the trees.

I've had this on my mind for some time,
And I finally have enough  time, patience, and wiz bang to get 'er done.


ahem. 


Not everyone thinks like you. 
No one in fact, is just like you. 
No one looks like you, talks like you, walks like you. 
No one can be you, better than you can. 
Its oddly obvious, yet we still strive so much to be like each other. 

So easily, we compare ourselves to others.
We doubt our blessings and try to be like the ones we look up to.
"People with money have everything they could ever need, they must be happy."
We equate fame, fortune, and platinum records... to peace, acceptance, and joy.
When shockingly, it adds up to be the complete opposite.



You have to be thankful for what you've got.
Whether its a diamond in the back of your cadillac....
or, your taillight is busted in your Rav-4
You better 'gangsta lean' in that shit,
regardless.

Its hard accepting people as they are sometimes,
but, when you look at life from the center...
You may realize that it may be kinda hard for others to accept you as well.
That's when the not giving a fck-ness comes into play.
As long as you are comfortable doing you, others will accept you for it.
They might not at first, but before the night is through,
Somebody will embrace you, be patient.
Everybody can find love, and friends are there
 to keep you company on this awesome path Life has made for us.
Love them,

Treat them, and everybody how you would be treated.
Let us forget to point out the flaws in others, and ourselves,
and remember that we are here together, going through the same trials, making the same mistakes.

Be happy,
Live as happily as your life can allow.



In my opinion, your happiness can only come from you.
Not money, not love, not success...  but you.
I'm positive your the happiest when you're doing stuff, you like to do.
Do that, everyday... and I promise things will seem better.
Smiles will become easier.

Well, at least for me it is.
I wake up every day more excited than the last.
Eager to learn new things, eat more chicken, watch more movies...

Reading makes me happy, so does taking dope ass pictures of my friends.
I enjoy talking to my mother, and yoga,
I love love love shopping, and having nappy hair.
Dancing,
I love to dance.
Ballet mostly... but I can get down to whatevs.

-sigh-
Those were just some things laying heavily on my mind,
Thanks for reading,

I love you all,


P.S
Women run the world.
simply put.

Writer's block

I can't wait to see how I've changed.
Five years from now I'll probably laugh at this.
They'll be good giggles...
I think.

Summer lovin - (c.2012)

Please pardon my absence...

I''ve been roaming on this earth for what seems like a lifetime.
Technically it has been, for what is my lifetime as of now but 21 years?
I always ask people, older people, how it feels to be old,
or how it feels to witness all the changes in the world.
Answers vary on the scale of positivity, some say 2 others say 10, and beyond.

Up until last night I thought I had it all figured out, life.
I thought I can use references from people around me to decide what the future will feel like.
I would inquire about the emotions that aging, responsibility, parenthood, and success brings.
However, a wise man told me, after I tried to comprehend the mystery of love,
for which I haven't yet fallen deeply enough in its gobbling slow-sinking sand pits to fully understand it
"Love is like a roller coaster..."  he says
My mind automatically starts playing Miss Chrissette Michelle, and I felt like I understood what he meant.
He continues "...you can't know what that means unless you've taken a ride. "

I felt left out,
sorta like the 6 year old girl two inches shy of the 'you must be this tall to ride the ride' marker.
I sighed, then quickly reverted to my previous lessons of life, and the theory of relativity.

"Everything that happens to you, can only be felt by you,
Overseers have their own perspective, based on different biases, of which are very different from yours.
Ones feelings, no matter how well described, can not be genuinely felt by the listener, only reciprocated."
-Addy

Oftentimes we look for the answers before we even read the question.
Call me crazy but, how are we to know what we should expect, what to look for.
Whenever it is I grow up, maybe 20 years from now, I don't want to be here,
I want to be there... far away,
Figuring out my own special methods to successfully complete the puzzle of life... my life.

I think K.dot said it best.

"Be different, do different things, don't do it like

                                he did, cause he ain't what you is, but we can win"

Life indeed is a mystery,

Beauty.

As  cliche' as this may be

Beauty is truly, in the eye of the beholder.
This might be the one thing we all have in common, beauty, and the ability to interpret it.
But that's where we differ...
Each and every one of our brains are completely different,
...as our fingerprints can verify.
We all see something no one else has seen, or ever will see

We all define beauty with different adjectives and references.
Darker skin or fuller hips, longer hair and straighter teeth,
Beyonce' or Michelle,
Covergirls, Strippers...

I just want you to remember that you are the most beautiful person in your world.
That's kinda what should matter to you the most.

Envy is what starts many wars, many fights
let it go,

Make-up was intended to enhance babygirl,
but when you wake up in the mornin, take a piss, and wash your hands
take a sec to look up in the mirror and make sure you thank god for creating you,
just as you are.

We all have things to be proud of,
stop complaining about the flaws,
be you,
and that is beautiful...


muah.

We all try.

I believe in happiness.

I believe in words.
in eyes.
I believe my elders.
I believe in the power of hip hop.
I believe in cool hair.
I believe that the world is our stage.
I believe you are the star of this show.
I believe in the clearance rack.
I believe in sweet smells.
I believe all religions.

I believe in God.
I believe we were made in His image.
I believe we are gods.


I believe in the laws of the universe.
I believe that faith is all we need.
I believe in perfection.

I believe everything we know might be a lie.
I believe that beauty is relative, as it should be.

I believe the depth of the color purple.
I believe the sky is blue.

I believe in change.
I believe in innovation.

I believe in second chances, third and fourth.
I believe in love, sex,war.
I believe that there is a match for each of us.

I believe in living strong.
I believe that things could always be worse.

I believe in smiles.


I believe that you are the most amazing person in the world.

Lil Wayne.

Man oh man, oh man,

Where do I begin, I'm mean, what does the "F" stand for
How do you still have things to say, how, how how.

Its been nearly a decade of pure ownership of the craft,
you werent even legal, but you knew you could run this rap shit.
Now we know.
Thank you for every club banger or hood anthem, crazy verse and every catchy ass hook.
Thanks for that Barbie girl, and Jimmy
 Neutron,  he's a fucking genius, and thank you for hearing that in him first,
Now like you he will be forever in our minds, future memories.

Oddly you "brought" us Curren$y,
well to me at least...
Damn,
 "Grown Man", that was my shitttttttttttttt.
like that voice he has just marinated the already tender ass steak of a song.

Carter II....
I'm gonna listen to that shit when I'm 58... and forever
It's so real.
How did a lil nigga fron the NO
asolutely change the fuck out of the rap game,
out of the music industry.

and, it probably happened as a revenge tactic, a smart ass concept.
because nobody wanted to take a southern rapper seriously, nope
so you showed them, you made them take you seriously,
mixtape after
mixtape,
after mixtape.

lord,
and now because of you, mixtapes are mandatory prerequisites for industry entry.


Thank you, if nobody ever told you,
You are the best rapper alive,



(Jay-Z I like you too bruh, I think you might have to just scoot over to share the throne)

Karl Marx, Wayfarers, South Beach, && hair Sheen,

After having a chat with a wise friend
watching a really awesome episode of Skins (U.K.)
googling a few new terms

I finally decided to write this.

I don't know if anybody still gives a dern about what I have to say,
but by golly, I am here.
and this will be here as long as here is now.

Today had a recurring theme of events.
This weekend rather...
Matter of fact, now that I look back, my whole week has been packed full of
Titles, Labels, Categories, Stereotypes.
Nobody thinks of these words and smiles,
why, because they suck.
that's why.

I just don't like the whole 'I think I know you because you look a certain way' thing
Why do people thinks its okay to predict the storyline without even reading the title
People obsess over the cover art, and they might even skim the pages for pictures
if your lucky.
But oftentimes, your whole life is already a fallacy crafted and created in a fools  mind.

A life of obedience and bliss if you're wealthy.
One of sadness and strife if you were a penniless homeless man.
A life of ease and carefreeness for daddy's little girl.
Packed cars and hard labor for Senors and Senoritas

I could go on for days about the different stereotypes.
What I really don't get, is how we can sit and acknowledge the foolishness, laugh and joke
but we still judge a person and predict their personality or character by their clothes.


When its the soul that's inside that we need
maybe its sub conscience...

Its crazy how ideologies work.


To solve the issue, me personally...
I will continue to strive for complete and total acceptance of me.
In the process hopefully, inspiring others to do the same.
If I have learned anything in my past 20 years, it is that
 in order to love your life, you must live it.
You must live each day stronger than the last,
Happier than ever before.

and

Happiness to you is unlike any other happy ever in time.

Lets not judge ourselves... aye

c'est la vie
.

Hitch.

Its a beautiful Sunday morning.
The birds are squawking outside of my window...
The breeze is breezing,
The winter is warm.

I don't really have anything to talk about.
I'm  kinda just enjoying my life,
and I want to be able to remember this moment so here I am.

I am exactly who I want to be.
Because, I created this
..me and the people who have "attracted" their way into my path
Everything I've done, every person I've encountered
Has made me,
Me.

I thank you all for featuring in my life,

What is not seen does not exist.
Beauty.
We create our own destinies.
Time.
Take risks, make mistakes, get messy

Bobby Brown.

This one is for Whitney.

We look at celebrities, we admire their success, we imitate their style, and gawk at their beauty.
We pry in their public lives, tell every secret they weren't even able to whisper,
and we expect them to be normal.

We expect them to be sober in a world where they are in a petri dish under our shitty microscopes,
poking and blinding.
While they're screaming for help, in search of a listening ear that can keep secrets locked away.
In a tower free from paparazzi, or screaming fans, backstabbers and brown nosers.
but "mo' money mo' problems" they say...

And then on the total opposite end of the spectrum we have homeless people,
Beggars and "crackheads" and "junkies" how we like to call them.
We dont give a shit about these guys,
We automatically assume that they'll be fine because they're poor and poor people need drugs,
Poor people deserve to be unhappy, because they must be weird and lazy if they can't get a job,
We clench our purses, hold our noses, and try our best not to make eyes contact.

It's funny, the people who need our attention dont get it,
 and the people dying for some space, gets clenched tighter.

We saw Whitney at her finest,
then she wasn't fine anymore,
and we stopped caring,
we laughed and mocked her,
forgetting all the things she did for us, all the sounds she made... for us.

Now we don't have her anymore, thankfully now we can remember.
Remember who she was... flaws, and perfection, just like we all have.

Britney Spears Ladies and Gents




the first comment under this is, "Bobby Brown's version is better. "
smh
when will we learn...

Listen Up.

Theres only two ways to feel tomorrow. Melancholy as heck, or really happy...

This is not for the really happy people... bitter people, this ones for you!


Untitled from ADDY G. on Vimeo.


uno!


part 2!!!!!

Inspir[ass]tion

Bidi Smalls ladies and gents.
Not only is she a bad bitch. She is a phenomenal dancer, photographer, and a pure tee dick hater. I love her because man, she's herself and ain't afraid of nothing, ass out and all. Shorty is fly as she wanna be to, you've probably seen her dope ass floating around tumblr.

Check out her blog ----> www.breakfastwithbidi.blogspot.com/
Twittah --->  @bidismalls
Tumblr ----------------------------> www.bidismalls.tumblr.com/

I salute you Bidi. I'm gonna attempt to learn the shit out of this dance. Unfortunately for you guys I'm probably not gonna do it thonged out. I'm not as tight as she is, literally. If you know what I'm saying.

Inspire [two]

"Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek"

  Today was a good one, for more reasons than one. I'm continuing my inspirational series with a man who has touched each and everyone of us. Not like a creepy touch kinda way either, more of an enlightening touch, one of change and hope. He inspires me.

   Barrack Obama is the man, for lack of a better description of power. I felt so proud as I watched the President stand in front of a room full of political powers, socialites, and military officials. All fans of this one man, this one black man, if that even matters anymore. The race of of man no longer has any relevance in the race for presidency, all because this man ran, all because those before him preached and prayed and stood up for what they believe. Now we are living the dreams they believed as they tossed and turned through the night, even when people said it would never be. Now it is.

    Not only is this man running the world, seeing as how America, like it or not, is the illest shit on the planet; he has the perfect right hand. Not the queer Speaker of the House man who distracted me as he fiddled and looked dead to the right of Obama tonight, but that gorgeous lady in blue. Michelle Obama. she exudes so much of everything that it takes to create lady. Grace, to sum it all up, so much grace. Beauty is relative, and even though her beauty is undeniable and her style is impecable, and her doobie was popping. Grace is what bring it all together and set her apart from every other woman in that room.

    I thank Obama for the change. This man was a regular nigga, just like you and I. He had family issues, student loans, forks in the road, but he kept pushing for what he wanted. He kept striving for the top. He worked hard as hell. Now he is the President. I dont think people who still make excuses dont know how big that shit is,  the President of the whole United States!  There is no excuse for you not to do whatever it is you want to do, that is only if you want to do it.  Race is another group we place ourselves in to hold us back, I relinquish the heavy baggage that comes along with carrying people that are not me. Because of him, we now have solid evidence that you dont need to set boundaries because you are born who you are.

I am my thoughts, not my beautiful dark color. I am my dreams, I am the future.
I dont want to be the prez, but I do intend on making a change. I plan on changing the whole world, the whole wide world.

God bless America

Inspire.

"You can do anything you set your mind to."

If I had a dollar for every time I heard that, I wouldn't need to be writing this right now. I would be tan as shit, living on an island with sexy chocolate servants feeding me grapes and fruit snacks. But,! Unfortunately for me, nobody gave me anything but words, at least they were wise ones so I can't really complain too much. 

If history has taught us anything --which obliviously it hasn't since we rewrite it over and over and over-- anybody has the power to do anything. Anything. I think it is the stories of the people that come before us that can help make life easier, make attaining succes a little less stressful, make happiness seem like less of a chore. So, this week I'm going to introduce you to my role models, people that inspire Addy. One day when I rule the world, I'm going to thank these people, and the whole globe is going to hear me. 

The first person I'm going to spotlight is the youngest out of the collection. This man is... phenomenal. I dont think there has been a person that I could relate to as much as him. He has single handily, with the support of his niggas of course,  changed the way our generation perceives the world. The people who listen that is, because some of his tactics seem "irregular" and "demonic" to those ignorant mother fuckers who don't listen to whats being said, they just skim through the pages and look at the pictures.  We dont care about them fagotts anyways...

I heard about this genius December 2010, since then I have stan-ly followed his career. It was amazing seeing the transformation. Seeing how day by day his dreams were coming true. Right before my eyes he released his free debut album 'Bastard' which was critically acclaimed for its groundbreaking envelope pushing tunes and lyrics. He shook up the mainstream pop, hip hop, rock world with his ability to be relatable to people from all walks of life. He released the best video of 2011 in my opinion, Yonkers, hitting  a millie views in 1 day. Priceless. 

He released Goblin in May. I listend to that and only that until July. I never grew tired. He has a clothing store now, he has world tours, a television show is in the making, And he did all of this while taking his crew with him! odd future wolf gang kill them all dont give a fuck. I love them, everything they are, I appreciate. I think we will remember this man forever, and somebody is gonna honor him when he's old as fuck, he might even have a movie. golf Wang. 

If you haven't already guessed, I am referring to Tyler, the Creator. Wolf Haley, Tron Cat, Dr. TC,  

I cried when I saw this, I felt like it was me up there. Just a kid living out his dreams, Dreams. 

Dreams. They really come true. 

I  

Play!

     Oftentimes I find myself being sorta hypocritical. I am. But aren’t we all...haven’t we all subjected our selves to the poor expression of leadership "do as I say not as I do."

      As much as I resent that portion of myself, or my mind to be more specific, I understand that we as humans make mistakes, sometimes we do shit we know we’re not supposed to. We go 80 in a 55, we tip less than 15%, we put gum under the seats. But how many times have we been caught, not too many times, I hope. We have all experience that relief from dodging bullets and bee bee's, dart, arrows, fists, whatever you want to call sliding under the radar.  That shitty feeling of getting caught is indescribable, but avoidable.  When you fuck up, admit it to yourself if no other party, look back, and laugh, look forward and focus. Be proud of your mistakes or deviances from the rules if rebellion was the motive. We control our fait.  God has given us this tool, our thoughts are the joystick for this game of life. 

     Do the damn thing. Play the fuck outta this game. Temple run… notice who scores the highest. The ambitiously addicted, the more you play the more you learn, the more coins you collect the easier it is to survive, to win,  to run, to make massively obnoxious scores and all that shit.  Can’t we equate that to life.  Temple run, the more you challenge yourself, the more knowledge you obtain, the easier it is for you to survive. To win.     

     I wonder where that explore is going, or why he’s running. Maybe he’s just a fast ass nigga, a thief who could’ve gone to the Olympics if he didn’t give up on his dreams, and maybe he’s bitter now, and decided to steal the fuck outta somebody’s treasure … Maybe were are assisting the rebellion!

Whatever the case may be, he is running… we are running. We have no idea where… in both cases,  and all we know is that the longer we play the closer we are to whatever treasure lies in our futures. Don’t let the past determine your speed, Let the unknowingness of tomorrow motivate you. Mistakes are meant to be made, let us not dwell or mourn because those thoughts used to remember only bring in more negativity. So the next time you seem down and out, upside down, inside out, believe that the only way out of your rut, is up. Run fast. We are stars. You are. 

Bugs Bunny.

My life has just changed. 

as it does every second. 

every time I meet something new. 

I decided it would be a great idea to accompany my already horrible gift wrapping skills 

with a documentary. 

Netflix has the greatest documentaries. 

Nextflix is the greatest. 

I should make a documentary on how great Netflix is. 

...anyways. 

I digress, back to my life altering documentary!

LIFE IN A DAY.

videos from all over the world from tons of people on one day. 24 July 2010 

24/7  as I like to imagine the inspiration came from. 

Up until about an hour and a half ago I didnt realize how large this world really is. 

How unimportant my life issues are.

There is no excuse for me to ever be sad... 

Life, in my non-expertise opinion is all about the pursuit of happiness. 

The running away from all things we fear, by running towards the things we love. 

No matter where in the world Carmen San Diego went, 

I'm pretty sure she made sure she was happy. 

Happiness. 

Happiness?? 

What does it mean to be happy?

Lets see what the fine folks at Google think... 

hap·py

   [hap-ee]  Show IPA

adjective, -pi·er, -pi·est.

1.

delighted, pleased, or glad, as over a particular thing: to behappy to see a person.

2.

characterized by or indicative of pleasure, contentment, orjoy: a happy mood; a happy frame of mind.

3.

favored by fortune; fortunate or lucky: a happy, fruitful land.

4.

apt or felicitous, as actions, utterances, or ideas.

5.

obsessed by or quick to use the item indicated: a trigger-happy gangster. 

Ambiguous. 

To me, happiness is comfort, and seeing other people not unhappy

Art makes me happy. 

&& Chipotle. 

French Fries. 

Great love stories... 

Attention makes me really happy. 

I imagine if I were to ask 10 different people what makes them happy I would get 11 different answers. 

Everybody has a story. 

Its amazing. 

Think about how many books there are in a library.

How many tweets are tweeted... 

How many people ther are in the world. 

All with there own set of heartaches and heart hugs.

I'm grateful to have seen this movie. 

There are people living perfectly fine without. 

Without money, without Chipotle... 

without love. 

Look around ladies and gentlemen, and pay attention to the documentary that life edits for you... 

Directed by your creator... which ever you believe. 

I realize today that there is so much more I can see. 

I will see. 

Money ruined the world. 

Thats the only thing that drives us, not love. 

Just money, well, The love of money drives us. 

The love of things. 

We are not products of our environment, we are consumers. 

You know what sucks, when people say they are thankful for being more blessed than another person. 

I believe we are all equal

 money is the only thing that separates us, and water. 

I wonder how those kids feel when people video tape them for infomercials...

I'd slap somebody if they came all up in my shit.

Merry Christmas Christians. 

Happy Hanukkah Jews. 

Every body else... happy holidays.

The Ides.

I felt like shit this morning when I woke up.
and then I got on twitter now I feel worse.

Shut upppp.
People talk about dumb shit.
I talk about dumb shit but man

There are some things you cant change...
like the weather or people dying for sneakers.
shit happens.

If you didnt stand in the fucking line.
How dare your judge anybody who did.
Maybe somebody is standing in line for a loved one
Maybe they worked hard all week to afford those shoes.
Maybe this has become a tradition for him, the IX release

Once again I repeat myself because nobodys listeneing!
Shut up.
Please.
There is bigger shit to talk about.

Like the fact that LA police are pressed as fuck for arresting Tyler.
smh...
I wish I could run away.
Get away from all this shit,
People not being okay with who you are.
Propaganda
telling me what to buy to be who I wanna be.
Coke Zero isnt gonna make me skinnier,
and that new mini van isnt gonna make you a better mom.
McDonalds isnt gonna make me a better black person either.
cmon son.
Are people really this stupid.

There are no commercials for jordans.
Why.
why do you think...
because people talk about it. tweet about it.
shit is real
so shut the fuck up.

If he wanted to stand in line let it be.
We are killing niggas for Coltan.
Coltan!
Thats not a problem right.
Or diamonds.
Or Drugs.
but we cant die for some awesome ass sneakers.
mkay.


This is just ranting as usual.
I hate everybody sometime.

I can't wait until I retire.
Rich as heck.
away form all these dumb ass people.
Christmas Traffic

Inspirational.


Congrats if you got those beautiful shoes we've all been waiting so long for.
I'm getting those shoes.
somehow.
someway.

Namaste

Krismasi.

Once again I shall give you my Christmas list. 

duh 

duh 

duuuuhhhhhhhhn.

iPhone 4s

Speck SeeThru SATIN Case

Retro Air Jordan XI- Concord.

GolfWang Paperback Book. 

Summer 2012- Kenya. 

Mishka Damaged Skullcap- Black.

Slippers Robe... Preferably Animal.

Everything on this list shall be copped. 

Somehow, 

Someway. 

ho ho ho 

slut slut slut. 

Merry Christmas

=) 

Hell Date.

I dont see how people hate being alone. 

Me and my mind can have so many conversations, parties, anything, 

Jusat the two of us. 

or one, or how ever you want to count it... 

I have a gift, or lots of them, 

I'm not quite sure which one will make me money , but hopefully it can. 

Hopefully I'll be passionate about whatever I do to make money. 

whatever job I have in 8 years... 

In 5 I want to not know where my life is going. 

I want to be oblivious to getting old. 

I want to be 25 and fly, 

no kids, 

no man... well maybe

but I'd rather be alone, traveling the globe and shit... 

partyin alone. 

Sometimes on dates,

and I use the term loosely because I really dont go on them, 

but on these alleged "dates" there is usually pain. 

Mental pain. 

Which in some cases I think that hurts the most, 

since pain really only ever exists in your minds you know. 

Kinda like a fire. it shoot up from the wound to the brain. 

from the splinter gunshot funny bone, to the deluxe apartment in the sky.... 

So, imagine if the pain began in your mind at host. 

What if the fire started in your apartment

Then your kinda fucked. 

but that's just my opinion... 

Anyways, I digress 

dates! 

Usually on these dates there sits adjacent to me a young man, 

a nice young man, 

cute and shit. 

all I usually think about is how much I would rather be on this marvelous date

alone. 

Not with him

just me by myself, 

watching this movie, eating this paid for meal, with just myself 

Without all the getting to know me hoopla. 

Because he really doesn't care, and he shouldn't. 

He couldn't possibly care about a person he knows nothing about, 

So why are we doing this. 

Why is he paying for this food, 

Because hes stupid... he has to be, 

 Stupid people do stuff  they wouldn't normally do because they are told, or taught. 

So, why would I wanna be with a stupid person? 

That's where my mind goes. 

Everytime I go on a "date"

loosely termed remember... because I don't call outings with stupid boys dates

Or maybe I do. 

Maybe the fun stuff should have a better terminolgy. 

Like..... excursion! 

date

"We dont call em dates no mo in '12 we call em excursions" gucci voice. 

So to all of you prospective excursion partners, 

know this...  

Lets not go anywhere, 

get to know me before you waste your money, 

Lets be able to go out when your hairs not cut, 

when you dont have to pay for my food, 

or ask me what my major is over the bread they give you before our meal. 

Lets get to know each other before the excursion. 

That why they created all these dumb ass social networking networks... right?

Lets use them for good instead of evil 

Peace be with you. 

up.

I met a man today,
I was amazed...
I sat there, at my dining table
with a room full of voices, loud ones....
and got lost in the stories of a man who was more than thrice my age.
80's or so,
This man was a talker, serious level of talking this man does...
and he does it well.
This man has 80 years of stories, and just so happen to be blessed with the gift to recall
and 'broadcast'  certain recollections of his life.

So, to continue...
This man was wicked awesome, we sat
jaws tired but anxious, he talked
Anxious as well, my mind wanted answers, I listened.
From hazing, to the brainwashing of the soldiers
Vietnam, to Hawaii, Florida, and back...




This new year is gonna be legit,
When people say college is used to find the answers,
or if they don't.
Know it is.
it is.

I've met so many people this past year,
learned so much shit.

be your self mankind.
There's so much more you can be.
learn.
see.

Flexin.

I often wonder how people perceive me...
but I can never truly know, no matter how hard I think... because I still have my own perspective
So I have to learn to live through my lenses no matter how distorted my views.
I have to remember that there is absolutely nothing I can do about my fucked up habits...
that is until I feel like changing.

Evolutionnn


One of the best semesters of my scholastic career
One of the best weekends
Its not many people I can be completely comfortable around...
Maybe once in a never I'll blog about that comfort.
once before....
but
Its crazy how comfortable I was,
Thanks for making me feel so comfortable.
I don't think you know how 'myself'  I am with you.
cool shit.
I have no idea how you feel... lol
and, I'm not sure I care to know.
All I know is that you ''do somethin to me. ''

Too bad things don't always end up how you want them to,
but hey,
you never really know

Gold Digger.

Ray changed my life.

Everything about it drives me wild, how the world really works.

His brother really died from falling in a tub of water…..

Now we can save people from A.I.D.S.

Provided the proper resources we can do anything,

We just need to put the pieces of the world together.

We were given the single legos…. by God.

Or whomever you believe,

We now have all the necessary resources to create our own Star Wars Galaxy

Its crazy how energy really does go from one piece to the next.

Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about how much work my mother does,

And how I’ll be when or if I ever have kids.

How awesome my kids are gonna be…

because I’m awesome.

And that’s how people act just like their parents.

One spark of energy passed to the next.

Everything that happens is a scene from a movie.

And the fact that we can’t see how truthful fictional movies are

Is kinda the measure of their true effectiveness.

The computer you’re reading this on is a dream that a real person had.

A real person clocked in 9-5 to design this screen.

Everything is something and we fail to realize this.

Crazy how people think that twitter is life.

When 60 years from now, inevitably twitter buzz shall die down

And life will go on.

Rose will have lots babies.

And they’ll grow up and do some dumb shit we don’t understand.

People fall in love.

I haven’t yet decided how I’m going to document this.

How I think people should remember love in my opinion.

I think of shit during the day

So, I guess this’ll be tomorrows random mind drive.

I cant wait until I’m old and I can sit and recollect on life.

In a trailer, or a barn with a yard and a garden and a pond.

Somewhere for me to getaway and find something new to do everyday.

From hunting to gathereing.

Plucking flowers and baking pies.

Or however life may be 50 years from now.